In my last post I told you about how I was feeling stuck in a rut of un-forgiveness. How even though I knew better, I had allowed myself to slowly float off track and ended up back in that bay of bitterness I so desperately despised. I’m resolved to turn this around because if I don’t I’m as good as dead.
You might say, whoa chill out Lance. Failing to forgive someone or someone’s is not going to kill you. Well, it might not kill you, but it will me. You see, a lack of forgiveness is the first step towards bitterness, which drops you off right near the road that leads directly towards resentment. And do you know what happens when people like me begin to harbor resentments? We use, we drink, we break the law, we throw away everything we’ve worked so hard to obtain, we leave our spouses, we abandon our children, we make horrible decisions and the guilt and shame of these decisions builds and builds and builds until we do something we can’t reverse. Sometimes that’s illegal, sometimes that’s irrational and sometimes, something that is fatal. Failing to practice forgiveness is a scary place to be.
But its not just scary for addicts. It’s scary for everyone. Just because you’re not an addict doesn’t mean you can get away with harboring unforgiveness. You are no different than I am. Floating in un-forgiveness can kill you too. It can kill your dreams, your marriage, your relationships, your future, your testimony and tragically your peace.
It’s funny how this forgiveness thing works. It’s the key for all of us to live happy, free, joy-filled, abundant lives yet it’s what so many of us rarely practice. Forgiveness simultaneously frees us and imprisons us, depending on what side of the word you land. For me, I’ve found that without forgiveness I’m no more sober than I was when I was snorting line after line of OxyContin. I can be clean as a whistle, which I have been for almost four years, but if I’m not practicing forgiveness consistently I’m a jerk. I have an uncanny ability to hold grudges, write people off and harbor bitterness. It’s sick sometimes just how hurtful I can be. The good news is today I can acknowledge what it is that’s holding me back from living out my purpose and strive to do better. I can desire to be someone different and make the choice in my head and heart to change. Today what is holding me back is forgiveness and all it takes is that one step of humility that lies in the land of forgiveness.
Today you may need to forgive someone like I do. Today you may need to forgive something buried in the past. Today you may need to forgive a family member. Today you may need to forgive the church. Today you may need to forgive a co-worker.
Whoever or whatever you need to extend forgiveness. There is no better day then today!
You have this great gift of choice today as well. If you find yourself struggling to maintain peace or if you feel yourself in bondage due to how someone treated you, spoke to you, ignore you or misunderstood you. Today you can make the choice to practice radical forgiveness, control what only you can control and start forgiving.
To sum it up practicing radical forgiveness is both radically difficult and radically simple all at once. It’s choosing to keep your side of the street clean while fully understanding that you have no control over how clean the other side is.
Forgiveness is what separates us from a life of bondage to a life of freedom. If we purposefully attempt to practice radical forgiveness day in and day out our life becomes lighter, more peaceful and bursting with freedom.
Let’s practice together!
-Hope is Alive
